I dream…
Posted on August 25, 2005
Filed Under /dev/null/ | 53 views |
From McSweeney’s: AN OPEN LETTER TO A GUY I WORK WITH WHO ALWAYS COMES INTO MY OFFICE TO TELL ME HE SENT ME AN E-MAIL RIGHT AFTER HE SENDS ME AN E-MAIL
Dear Louis,
You’re a very nice man and I do enjoy working with you. The fact that you own a donkey and a rooster makes me laugh. I don’t know many people who own a donkey and a rooster who don’t also live on a farm. You’re sincere and there is not a whit of vitriol in your body. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you mad. Often you share your lunch with me when you can’t finish it.
That’s why this is difficult for me.
Every time you come into my office I already know what you’re going to tell me. You’re going to tell me that you sent me an e-mail. And usually, just about the time you’re walking into my office, the boingy sound that I set up to alert me that I have received an e-mail is boinging. Or it boings right while you’re standing there. Then we say the same things: You say, “I just wanted to let you know I sent you an e-mail!” I say, “Yup, just got it.” And then you say, “Great, thanks! Just wanted to let you know!”
I know you’re a bit older and not technically inclined. I know you still use words like “facsimile” and “teleconference.” But here’s the thing with e-mail. When you send me one, I get it. That’s the whole point of it. Really. It’s why they invented it. So you can send me stuff electronically, and I can get it.
I want you to know I dream of killing your donkey.
Sincerely,
Jason
(Thanks Pony!)
Comments
2 Responses to “I dream…”
Leave a Reply
We both know someone who does this very thing. Ugh!!!
Hehe - I can’t imagine I know who you’re talking about